Another Step...

I finally did it: I booked an out-of-town solo gig. Freddy and Kendall are touring to support Kendall's new CD and, when I heard they were doing something in Rochester, I kinda... got a spark.[*] So a couple days ago I was chatting with Freddy and said, "look. Let me join you for this." And he agreed.

w00t!

Artistically and musically I'm ecstatic. I'm really flying high on this notion of getting around and performing more - independence! I think it's a good step for me. I mean it's not _exactly_ the route I want to be taking for myself but it's definitely a huge leap in that direction.

But as the person with the insecurity complex who now has to _PERFORM_?!?

Yeah, I'm a tad terrified. meep!

I mean I have been getting much better. The last couple visits[*] to the open mic felt pretty good. I wasn't perfect, of course, but I was in my element - I felt like I was in control. It's a far cry from where I was back in NYC or even here just a year ago. Plus I'll have Freddy and Kendall's presences to draw upon.

But yeah... I'm still dealing with my stage fright already. *heh*

Logistically it will be tricky, too. I'll have to bus it up on the day of the show (arriving in Rochester in the am) then leave pretty much right after the gig. I just *can't* miss much work right now. Nor do I have much time to lose here in Philly with the BoLW stuff.

So yeah, I'm curious to see what my physical and psychological states will be like. I have a feeling I'll hit that, "this is what it is" sort of mentality and relax enough to give a good show. I mean I think I'll be okay though of course not as FUCKING STELLAR AMAZING as I expect myself to be.

*eyeroll*

I'll hit a couple open mics before I leave and see if I can polish up some of the material. I rarely expect to perform so my memory for lyrics is often... interesting. *heh* I mean my memory in general is... interesting. :/

But after this? If it goes well? I still want to get to Boston and do something there. Austin and San Antonio are on the list of places to visit, of course. So is San Fransisco.

God, I so want to travel more. I also want to get some of these other things off the ground - the improv stuff, the live sampling...

But first things first, I guess.

• Okay. My primary impetus is to see Chris and Steve. I haven't seen either of them in 4 years. Then after that are seeing Freddy and Kendall and performing.
  
• I'm not counting the time I tried my electric bass. That was just *NOT* meant to be that night. Ugh.